Last week’s 2.5-hour ride actually covered 35 gruelling miles, so why I said we only did 26 beats me. I have difficulty reading the bike computer without glasses, I suppose; it must be my age. Actually, I’ve always been at a funny age – it’s just that now I’ve turned 60 I have an excuse.  

As for this week: We were only on the road for 1.5 hours today, but the course was more challenging than last week’s longer one – a couple of long uphill 7-percent drags; a short, sharp 10-percent climb; and two long 12-percent climbs. Along with just about every other hill in the area in between. If there was a hill, we went for it. 

The average speed was down to 12.8 mph, but I’m holding my weight and going for the burn. Or at least that’s my story.

I am more confident with hills these days. Until recently, when I saw a hill I stiffened the sinews, girded the loins and went for it with all my might, in the hope that I would have enough puff to get over the top. Most times I made it, but it’s not smart cycling. 

As the hills I now cycle are much bigger, I have had to think laterally and smarter: I now cycle up them well within myself and feel so much better as I go over the top. Indeed, I have so much confidence in my new hill climbing style that these days I never feel I won’t make it. Of course, it can be embarrassing when people walking their dogs overtake me, but at least in my case man and bike are as one – unlike some of the owner-dog partnerships…

In an earlier blog I described how John views unkindly being overtaken by ‘whipper snappers’, and cited a specific example of the humiliation he likes to deal out. Well, he’s done it again.

There I was, struggling up Arnside hill from the Albion pub, when another cyclist caught up with me. We exchanged the usual pleasantries – nice day, better than yesterday, good to see a little sun, etc – before he pulled ahead to reel in John and add another scalp to his handlebars. 

John, of course, had seen him coming. Just as Junior caught up to him he stood on his pedals and was off over the hill, leaving the younger guy wondering what had hit him. 

Reminds me of the film Seabiscuit, about the little horse who could. In the final race in the film (a true story, by the way) Seabiscuit takes on the champion horse who had won everything in racing in the USA. Just like the horse, John looked into the eyes of this would-be challenger, measured and tested him, and in that glance ultimately found him wanting. He put on a spurt and left the other cyclist, who in reality was half his age, floundering far behind. 

It’s all too easy for John. Ordinary mortals like me need oxygen, whatever our age.

15st 2lb, 26 miles of up and down and round about at an average speed of just 13.9mph. A brand new course that took in just about every hill in the area, and which was wickedly planned by John to ensure that at all points on the circuit, bar none, the wind was in my face. Totally knackered I was, at the end. 

I’ve just got to do better – the Wrynose route is almost four times as far and brutally hilly. I figure that if I can get to Ulpha, just north of Broughton in Furness in the Duddon valley, and still feel reasonably strong, I’ll be able to beat it. I say this because I drove the early stages to this section last Friday and was reminded that the ups and downs to Ulpha are definitely not for the faint hearted. Nor indeed for the sane – but this is not a rational challenge for your average 60-year-old (me).

Great new wheels, or at least new Swiss spokes and Mavic rims. 

This week I was on my own, as John is marshalling a club time trial. The wind was strong so I found a new route that kept me sheltered – that’s relatively speaking – while directing me as many hills as possible, per the plan. 

But could I get the bike computer to work? What is it with me and bike computers? You buy them, you look after them and you know what you get in return for the love and nurturing: Nothing. They don’t work. 

Oh, but hang on minute. Halfway round the circuit I realized I had forgotten to fix the spoke sensor in place. No signal sent to the computer, no readout. 

Next week, next week it will all come together…